I had quite an interesting talk with a member today about how his "friends" were routinely derailing his attempts at fitness. How they wanted to party (which means staying up until 4:00am and getting drunk) and would be quite obnoxious to him when he says "no".
An example of "partying" which I loathe in all forms, quit while you’re young, get ahead.
So that got me really thinking, I wondered if this was a common thread? Do lots of my friends who workout here deal with this same derision from their other "friends", be it semi-monthly bunco parties or "having" to go with friends for a drink to celebrate a promotion or whatever.
Friend:
- A person whom one knows, likes, and trusts.
- A person whom one knows; an acquaintance.
- A person with whom one is allied in a struggle or cause; a comrade.
- One who supports, sympathizes with, or patronizes a group, cause, or movement: friends of the clean air movement.
Are your "friends" supporting, sympathizing or patronizing you? Are they allied with you in your struggles? Or do they hold you back? Do they pressure you into curtailing plans to make yourself better?
Write a list, do this exercise. I suggest you remove people from your life who aren’t your friends. These people likely only serve themselves and waste your time, money and energy.
I’d like to get a discussion going, so please post back with comments, thoughts, reflections, cancellation letters 😉
Thanks Jesse
This last weekend, I worked both days, took Carrie out for our 18 month anniversary at Pasta Bella in Ballard. On Sunday I practiced kip and giant swings with my brother John D. tearing calluses off of my hands. Bought car seats for my boys who came home yesterday!! And spent 4 hours at the hospital with my sons, holding them while they slept.
Great point!
Proud to have you as a friend Jesse!
We all enjoy a party from time to time. I know I wouldn’t mind being in that picture!!! I still go out with my friends I just don’t drink as much. So far none of them object, they just want me around.
Glad to hear the boys are home finally.
Thanks Morg, as far as I’m concerned if your ready to be an athlete I feel that you need to be ready to take your whole life to the next level. That includes leaving the night life behind to a great degree. It takes to much out of you. I want to see us be better.
I find that I still enjoy the social aspect of going to a party with my friends on occasion and its up to me to have the control to stay in control. At some point we need to stop blaming the people around us aka “friends” for our inability to have some self control. I agree though that if you are being pressured into drinking/drinking more or being criticized for trying to be better than those people aren’t truly people you need around you.
Well here is my 2 cents worth. Saturday nights I go out and drink with the fellas. My friends don’t pressure me to drink at all. Actually they would probably be more happy if I was the continuous DD. Then they don’t every have to drive. I stay very strict on the Zone 6 out of 7 days so I’m pretty solid there. The way I look at it is that I’ve restricted 6 days of my week to being on peak performance level. Then on Saturday if I choose to eat and drink poorly I’m still doing a ton better than when I wasn’t on the Zone. I’ll admit that I have a long way to go before I reach my goals if ever. But a start is a start and I’ll adjust as necessary to get where I want to be.
Glad you brought this up Jesse….I only have a few close friends and most of them seem pretty supportive of me acheiving my goal of being a Trooper for the Washington State Patrol. Since Ive started this application process I have almost completely stopped consuming alcohol and partying for more then one reason. (Would hate to get pulled over for DUI sinc eim such a lightweight lol). There are two friends in particular that come to mind when you ask if your friends are true friends or not. Everytime we go out Im pressured about not drinking and even if I have maybe 1 beer or less Im poked fun at for not drinking enough. Theres also the friend that complains about me going to the gym instead of hanging out with them prior to going to work. Im finally seeing improvement physically and am so close to reaching my goal of getting into the Academy that Im starting to wonder if these so called “friends” really are friends and supportive of my goals. Thanks Jess!