Watch this video, seriously.  This is some twisted psycho crap.

Three keys to take home:

1. The ones that don’t get results, get “the ax”.

In research (clinical research) they call this fixing the data.  An example: the FDA looks at the influence on diet in health epidemiology.  The researchers threw out several large states that showed grain consumption having the greatest correlation with obesity and heart disease, because that didn’t really jive with what was out there, and they didn’t want to seem contrary.  WHAT THE CRAP!?  So instead of thinking that your program just doesn’t work, you kick out the ones that it’s not working for and move on.  Solid training philosophy.

2.  He didn’t get the results he was supposed to, while working with his trainer.

There are many possible interpretations here.  Some if I may.  First, that this clients diet was so poor that the two 20 minute session each week weren’t enough to overcome that and get him results.  Second, perhaps they didn’t discuss diet formally at all, leaving him to his own devices.  Third, maybe they did but the diet was too difficult for him to adjust to, i.e. they should have changed his diet more incrementally instead of all at once making the transition simpler. Fourth, maybe he should have had more frequency in his workouts.  Fifth, maybe his goals were too aggressive. Sixth, maybe the workouts seem difficult but they aren’t as adaptive as the perceived intensity relates.  Seventh, maybe he’s a faker and acts that the workouts are harder than they really are.  Eighth, maybe the training atmosphere isn’t enough to motivate him to be the best he can be.  I’m done.

3. He went out on his own, after getting fired, and got “above average” results in fat loss and muscle increases by upping his cardio and focusing more on his diet.

I see this a proof positive that X Gym’s “program” is unadaptive.  BY NOT DOING THEIR STUFF, he got ABOVE AVERAGE results.  Which means that BY DOING THERE STUFF, you get AVERAGE RESULTS, according to their system.  Weird.  This means that average X Gym results are LESS than cheesy, cardio and weight routines that nearly everyone does at Globo Gyms world wide.  Further THESE PEOPLE COME TO CROSSFIT BECAUSE THEY AREN’T SEEING RESULTS.  My mind is spinning over here.

Here’s what I think.  I wish we had this guy.  BAD.  He’d be like Shane, down well over 100 pounds.  He’d be like Ann, pull-ups in 6 months.  He’d be like Charles, muscle-ups on rings.  He’d be like Jef, adding 70 pounds to his front squat.  He’d be like Shannan, front squatting her bodyweight! He’d be like Katie, learning how to run.  He’d be like Art, pounding out ring dips.  He’d be like Collin, deadlifting 365.  He’d be like Tracy, getting her first 7 straight body push-ups ever.  He’d be like Frank, training his military press to new heights.  He’d be like Dan and Dan, doing their first powerlifting meet.  He’d be like John and Nicole, training for a triathlon. He’d be like Laura, getting the banded pull-up to “click” so she can string them together.  He’d be like Karen, hit it so hard that you need to lay off for a while.  He’d be like KP, learning to climb the rope, hating the burns.  He’d be like Pam, idolized by the masses.  He’d be like Mark, running a sub 6 minute mile.  He’d be like David, getting more flexible while getting stronger.  He’d be like Melissa, getting coordinated to learn the jerk.  He’d be like Lindsay spending hours each week on gymnastics.  He’d be like Austin with a 3:19 Fran time.  He’d be like Phill, taking great clean mechanics to the next level.  He’d be like CJ, deciding once and for all to get strong!  He’d be like Mike, changing his life to try and become a Police Officer.  He’d be like Kim, fighting every step of the way.  He’d be like – whatever, this is the craziest thing yet isn’t it?  This guy gets kicked out because their program doesn’t deliver and because they have the audacity to kick him out, he comes back begging to get let in, to the place that didn’t serve him as they should have in the first place.  I hope his home life is stable.

Can you guys please help your friends and family who aren’t here yet to get here, so they don’t get suckered into this crap?!

Thanks for letting me rant.  I’m gonna go train Mel now and help her to Jerk, lift stones and run better so she can do the Bloomsday Run in spokane in May and the Strongman contest in August – anyone wanna join us?